So, I weighed in last night and I had gained 4.8 lbs in the last month. And I didn’t beat myself up about it, really, aside from eating a million Milano cookies. It could’ve been a lot worse.
On Friday Craig and I learned that the chance of us having a second child is practically 0%. I’ve been on pins and needles the last month and it was finally confirmed. I am all over the place with this. My day to day function has improved because I now feel like we are no longer in what Dr. Seuss calls, “the waiting place.” We can move on knowing our fate and love the heck out of the miracle baby we have. We can clean out the baby stuff, and declutter our home and plan for life with the three of us. I can go back to the gym and my diet/healthy eating and finish what I started.
But, every time I see a pregnancy, a baby, a birth announcement, I know it’s going to sting for a while. Probably a long while. And I know it’s something I am going to have to actively work on overcoming.
But, I do know that God is good. And as cliche as it is, I am profoundly blessed. And every day I am going to do my best to be grateful for all that I have.
And I am going to do my best to not dwell on what I can’t or don’t have.