One year ago today I went to my surgeon’s office for my first appointment in this journey. I was going to California the next day on a trip and I had to purchase a seat belt extender. I was at a real low point in mental health, and a high point on the scale.
I took these pictures that day.
It’s hard to look at these pictures. I had gotten so big, it’s hard to believe I took up that much space. I was so uncomfortable in my own skin. I wasn’t living my best life. I was getting larger in size and trying to disappear at the same time.
Today I took these same pictures, and this is what they look like.
It’s nice to see a tangible difference in pictures. It’s also nice to know that there are many changes in my life that have brought about good things. More to share later on that… for now I am about to have a popsicle.
We have a busy Mother’s Day weekend. It started yesterday at Henry’s Pre-school. They have a Mother’s Day party. Being a mother is something I try to never take for granted. I fought hard to become a mom, and while it was painful, emotional and something I wouldn’t wish on anybody, I believe it has made me so grateful for all of the moments. I had to keep my emotions in check as I drove to his school, feeling so blessed that I am his mom. The kids sang songs to us moms, then they served us a cookie and punch. They also have us presents.
After, we took this picture with one of my besties, and her son, who is Henry’s bestie.
My friend is thin and in shape and when I saw this picture I didn’t hate it. That never happens. For the first time in a long time I didn’t look twice the size of the friend I was standing next to. I promise I am not being self deprecating or self hating. I am just being honest.
I love this picture. And I love the friendships between her and me, and between our sons.
Tonight one of my other besties, Beth (the other Beth of thetwobeths) and our moms are going to see P!nk and we are so excited!! She puts on a great concert and it will be a fun night with our Mom’s for Mother’s Day weekend.
Tomorrow we will go to my Mother In Law’s house and then home to chill.
My May is pretty crazy until about the 21st. Then it starts to be a little less crazy. That’s the day of 8th grade graduation.
I hope you all have a good Mother’s Day weekend. I know it’s not always an easy day for everyone. My heart is with those of you who have a difficult day.
One of my good friends from high school posted a picture of a mini reunion get together we had at a bar over Thanksgiving Break. And it caught me off guard. I look unrecognizable to myself. I immediately wanted to hate on myself and the picture.
But, then I took myself to a place of gratitude.
I am not in that place any more. And right now I am using my new tool in the best way I know how. I’m eating protein rich, nutrient dense foods. I’m eating meals and snacks and not grazing. I’m logging every single thing I eat. I’m getting about 10,000 steps a day, sometimes a little less. I gave up hot coffee and my beloved chemical coffee cream for at least 5-6 days a week.
There are a few things I could be doing better but I’m working on it.
I can tell you it was great to go to a concert tonight and just be in my seat and not spill over to the person next to me. It was great just to get up with ease and dance to the music, not worried about my clothes being too tight and how I looked from the back.
I know this rapid weight loss won’t be forever but I am enjoying the journey and taking in the lessons and creating new healthy habits to replace my old self sabotaging ones.
Crazy to me the difference. I feel sad looking at that first picture.
I hope you are all having a good week!
I have never in my life lost more than 30-35 pounds. This is so exciting. I have been the same weight for about 15 days and today the scale finally moved.
I don’t have many pictures. I need to take more pictures!! But here is one from lunch with my friends last week.
I’m still trying to start a morning exercise routine. I started reading a book called “Rewired” in an effort to learn how to be more disciplined. The good news is, brain science says I can do this. The bad news is brain science says in order to do it, I just need to do it. 🤪
Over and over again.
Then a new connection will be made.
It’s the last weekend of my Spring Break and then starts the roller coaster of the end of the school year. My May is so crazy it gives me anxiety to think about. But I just have to take it one day at a time.
I hope all is well with you!
Update: pictures from today
So, yesterday my mom called me while I was at a retirement party at school to tell me Henry had a 102 fever and she was going to give him a Tylenol. I was a little alarmed because Henry hasn’t ever had a really high fever.
Then my mom called me an hour later, after the Tylenol, his temperature was now 103. So, I called the doctor’s office and went to my mom’s to find him like this.
He was so lethargic and sad looking. They got him in at the doctor’s office right away. He was so brave at the appointment and insisted on sitting up.
His fever was 102.9 at the office, so they gave him a dose of Motrin. Within the hour I could tell his fever was reducing. He was talkative again and so much less lethargic. They tested him for strep and it was positive. She said it came up positive almost immediately.
So… we are drinking the pink medicine for 10 days, two times a day.
He looks a lot better today, but still has sick eyes.
I am having a slow morning but I have lots of plans of cleaning stuff out today and getting rid of clutter.
I already put my 8 bags of too big clothes in my trunk to take to Goodwill.
Yesterday was a weird food day, nothing tasted good or settled right. I think it was the hot coffee and chemical creamer I started the day with.
But then I went through my spring clothes and it was so emotional. I was so happy to be able to get rid of so many clothes that don’t look right any more and so happy to fit into some clothes, especially dresses, that I’ve never been able to wear before.
Here are some of my bags… I still have to tackle my winter clothes.
***If anybody has an interest in these just let me know! I’ll be taking them to Goodwill or St. Vincent in two weeks during my spring break. (They are sizes 2X and some 3X and pants size 22-26. Mostly 22’s though.)
Here were some of my happy moments.
The first is a dress that fit me like a sausage and I’ve never worn before.
The second one is a bathing suit cover up that never fit either.
Below was my go to jean Capri for the last few summers. They were the only ones that fit.
Today I’m gonna tackle the fall/winter clothes.
Have a good Sunday!